ABSTRACT
Martina Nalesso grew up in Italy as an only child. Italy is now a multicultural society however during Nalesso’s childhood the vast majority of the population where she grew up was Italian. In later years, her father’s background piqued her interest. He was born in Belgium (of Italian parents) and lived in Belgium until the age of 12, yet his early years were never spoken about. All she knew was that her father’s childhood was characterised by painful events which she can now see had left him with unprocessed trauma including around aspects of identity. Her father passed away 15 years ago which means many questions about his childhood will have to remain unanswered. In this chapter, Nalesso unpacks the ways in which issues of identity and belonging played out in her life, at times mirroring her father’s struggles, especially in her own relocation first to Spain as a young adult and then to England. Drawing from ideas rooted in psychoanalytic theory around first and second languages and their meanings, she explores notions of ‘motherland’ and the unconscious resonances of seemingly ‘betraying’ one’s roots. As well, reflecting on her father’s return to Italy as an adolescent, Nalesso will explore the psychic residue remaining when ‘Great Mother Italy’ does not live up to expectations.
