ABSTRACT
In “You Only Like the Beginnings,” 1 I discuss the now-cancelled HBO dramedy Looking (2014) in order to explore the desire for “newness” in urban gay male cultures. I argued that in the imagined universe created in Looking, the modern negotiation of queer relationships not only looks unromantic but it is also untidy in the sense that the messy categories of romance, marriage and sex overlap and do not always fit well together. In this chapter, my aim is to examine the representation of queer relationships in film, television and literature, and start a discussion about whether a queer desire for “newness” clashes with the opposing desire to “settle down” (marriage). Part opinion piece, part scholarly article, my chapter will explore whether the search for the “new” in sex, relationships etc. inadvertently leads to a fundamental and profound loneliness for many urban gay men who desire a long-term relationship, but may find it difficult to begin and sustain one.
