ABSTRACT
In the hopes of helping us all fi nd our own voices, I use the phrase, creating spaces, to conceptualize interpersonal advocacy. Creating spaces is undergirded by a central assumption-you cannot control people to such an extent that they consistently act or believe how you prefer. In other words, as an advocate, you can participate in creating a relational space for growth, but the other person has to be willing and able to enter that space and, eventually, co-create that space so that she is able to think and act in a manner true to her own self. One way to think about this is-whenever possible, create spaces where if something good can happen, it will . A personal story with one of my sons illustrates this central principle. Daniel dropped out of high school in his junior year, while I was teaching Family Communication at Arizona State University! Oh, the irony. One afternoon, during this diffi cult time, Daniel looked at me and said, “Dad, you can’t make me change. I have to want to change.” Such wisdom from a 17-year-old. He was absolutely right. All Ann (my wife) and I could do was try to create a space where if something good can happen, it will so that when Daniel was ready, something good would happen-and, it eventually did.
