I really thought that the counselling was coming to an end early in the summer. I felt good. I felt I had resolved so many issues and was feeling positive about my life. I couldn’t believe what then emerged. Hearing myself speaking in that session when I talked about what had happened to me when I was about four, oh God, that was an awful shock. It was so real, so horribly real. And from then on it just got worse. And all, seemingly, triggered by that look, that expression I saw on my father’s face when he had Susie on his lap.