Your anger can be an ally or an enemy. Anger generally feels painful and uncomfortable when you experience it, but it is an integral part of your humanness and important to your physical and emotional survival. Anger is a fact of life. However, being angry does not mean you need to be controlling, punishing, and abusive. Depending on how you use it, your anger can build self-confidence and self-esteem and enhance relationships, or it can create guilt, shame, and remorse and destroy relationships and intimacy. This handout offers some ideas about what anger is and what it is not and how you can make your anger a more helpful force in your life.