ABSTRACT
This is something that many people find difficult to do as it often implies giving away personal information. Also it is often felt that to confirm the impact is to reinforce the power within the aggressor. Think, however, have you ever lost your temper and shouted at someone, only to regret the act an hour or so later, thinking that you may have hurt or upset the other person? Effectively this verbal association between behaviour and impact can eliminate the time gap. Furthermore, if we are to give the person the opportunity to be responsible for the behaviour, it becomes important to allow them to have direct confirmation that their behaviour is creating damage. If we do not say we are being damaged, how can we expect them to know?
