ABSTRACT
Most families going through such painful transitions need support, both practical and emotional, as well as some legal advice. Some family members turn to family and friends; indeed, because divorce is now so common few of us remain untouched by it, whether directly or indirectly, so advice based on personal experience is readily available. Yet, the endeavour to give such support involves a real test of integrity for those who attempt it, as it is also likely that only a few of us are able to be objective and supportive at one and the same time. In attempting to give assistance to members of families during the divorce and remarriage processes we are likely therefore to perceive the situation through the lens of our own experience and to react accordingly, albeit often unknowingly. Indeed, for some there may be a danger that the embers remaining from the fires of our own divorce may result in our fanning the flames of those of our friends and relations who are currently going through theirs.
