ABSTRACT
Approximately 90 % of Americans expect to marry at some point in their lives, and most expect their marriages to be a lifelong commitment (DeFrain & Olson, 1999 ; Thornton & YoungDeMarco, 2001). Despite high divorce rates in the U.S., there are strong societal expectations to marry, and to have a marriage that is full of intimacy and romance. People in marriages face countless risk factors for marital distress. For those who experience marital distress, the emotional and physical consequences are far-reaching. Because we deal extensively with marital distress and divorce in subsequent chapters, this chapter is devoted to understanding what successful couples do to maintain and repair their marriages. A concentrated focus on the processes that lead to marital success is critical, because “it is not prudent to assume that the road to happiness and good health is to simply not do that which apparently leads to sickness and unhappiness” (Segrin, 2006 , pp. 16-17). Some of the best researchers in marital communication focus attention on the behaviors and perceptions characteristic of spouses in successful marriages. In this chapter, we explore these behaviors and perceptions to better understand what successful couples are doing and saying to each other, as well as how they are thinking about their partners and their relationship. We also address questions about whether there is more than one way to make a marriage to work. Our review of couple types illustrates that although there are some general principles common to successful marriages, not all couples approach relational processes in the same way. Finally, as we examine different types of couples, we explore the strengths and challenges of same-sex couples and long-term married couples.
