ABSTRACT
The struggle between being the same and being different is at the heart of social life. As individuals we struggle to be accepted and liked by those with whom we identify, with whom we have a sense of bonding and belonging. At the same time, as individuals, we struggle to be seen and accepted as different if not unique. In our everyday lives we play a crucial game in which we balance this drive towards saying and doing things that mark us out as being the same and, often at the same time and in the same place, we say and do things that mark us out as being different. Social life is an ongoing process of balancing being the same-and accordingly practicing self-surrender and self-denial-with being different through developing, expressing and emphasizing one’s uniqueness.
