ABSTRACT
Donald and Ted, a white couple in their forties, had been in an on-again, off-again relationship for more than 2 years when they called for a consultation. Both men were HIV-positive. Donald was in excellent health. Ted's health was more precarious. Their presenting problem was that Ted was reluctant to define their relationship as “permanent.” He said it was not because he was half-hearted about Donald, but he interpreted Donald's unwillingness to commit to sexual exclusivity as Donald having one foot out the door. As might be expected, Donald did not agree with this assessment of their relationship, citing Ted's lack of commitment to a long-term relationship as his rationale for having sex with other men. The men were entrenched in this no-win cycle of blame.
