ABSTRACT
Your couple sexual style is usually different than your relational style (which focuses on dealing with differences and conflicts). Couple sexual style involves balancing each person’s “sexual voice” (autonomy) with being an intimate sexual team who integrate intimacy and eroticism. There is not a “right” sexual style which fits all relationships. The Best Friend relational style is the best fit but is not a good fit sexually. There is so much closeness that they de-eroticize each other and with so much emphasis on mutuality, partners do not make sexual initiations, so have a low sex relationship. Each couple sexual style has strengths and vulnerabilities. The challenge is to choose the best fit for you. For the majority of people, the Complementary couple sexual style is the best fit – it promotes “his”, “her”, and “our” bridges to sexual desire. A major contribution the sexuality field brings to the relationship field is the importance of developing a couple sexual style which promotes and maintains sexual desire.
