ABSTRACT
At a European conference on self-esteem, Michael Clifford, PhD, proposed that children need close, connected relationships so badly that when admirable grown-ups aren’t available, kids use their imagination. They may attempt to have their psychological needs met through movies, television, and literature. When a like-minded adult is available to mirror a child and be idealized by them, self-esteem rises and the child is able to experience the admired adult as part of themselves, and a deep emotional connection or belonging then follows. In comparison to children who have low self-esteem and unmet empathic needs, those with high self-esteem are better able to tolerate the disagreements and disappointments that are a natural part of authentic interactions and everyday life. Clinical wisdom suggests that people with a highly developed self-esteem are adept at building authentic relationships. When children have high self-esteem, they are able to have their own opinions and authentically engage with others.
