ABSTRACT
Some people’s sex drive is relatively unaffected by these nonsexual matters, whereas others find that it takes very little to push their desire for sex onto the back burner—or off the stove and out of the kitchen. There is a wide range of normal on this dimension, so there is nothing right or wrong here, but a couple who wants to have sex with each other needs to find ways to get onto the same page at the same time, at least sometimes. While most people aspire to have more sex, it’s important to note that that means more good sex—sex that is worth wanting. It’s hard to be motivated to work for more sex that is boring or so-so. However, if the unspoken is interfering with a better sex life and causing possibly less dramatic but too frequent discontent, it may be better to just bite the bullet and dive into that difficult conversation.
