ABSTRACT
The continuing bonds theory is outlined in this chapter. It emphasized the continued connection people have with the deceased and the construction of a new relationship with that individual over time. The contrary nature of this theory to earlier ideas, that is, in order to have a healthy adaptation to loss one must cut ties and move on (aka leave behind what’s lost and maintain life in its absence) is discussed. Further, the so-called “grief work hypothesis” is detailed. The idea that the adaptiveness of continuing bonds might depend on attachment style is also presented, as is the application of this theory to the context of addiction and recovery. The argument is made that reminiscing on and retaining a connection to the former “addict” self may promote recovery rather than threaten it. Tips for counselors are included throughout.
