ABSTRACT
A great number of assertions could be made about reality, and most of them would be to some extent values-based. The assumption that "concrete" reality should always take precedence over subjective reality when it comes to choosing what to do would be a false one. There are realities that one "cannot escape" and realities that one "cannot grasp". The "importance of uncertainty" will be another way of looking at the "intrusion of reality". This chapter considers the empirical/objective and the values-based/subjective, and argues that each is a reality that can intrude on the other. Each parent demonstrates an ability to cope with the intrusion of reality represented by the existence of the other parent. Therapists, from all angles, attest to the developmental harm caused when an actual child has to make parental adjustments in order to accommodate the uncontained emotions and needs of their actual parents.
