ABSTRACT
The experience of being alone in the presence of the other is rooted in the early mother–infant relationship, which D. W. Winnicott names "ego-relatedness"—and later in his work "object-relating". A large number of such experiences form the basis for a life that has reality in it instead of futility. The individual who has developed the capacity to be alone is constantly able to rediscover the personal impulse, and the personal impulse is not wasted because the state of being alone is something which always implies that someone else is there. In almost all our psycho-analytic treatments there come times when the ability to be alone is important to the patient. Clinically this may be represented by a silent phase or a silent session, and this silence, far from being evidence of resistance, turns out to be an achievement on the part of the patient.
