ABSTRACT
This chapter focuses on regulation in the relationship between infant and carer, Louis Sander describes his systemic perspective and points out how there is always a natural polarity between rhythms that ensure adaptation and attachment and states that disrupt rhythms and produce uncertainty, variation and differences. It describes developmental processes and the enlivening of the psychotherapy process. The desire to feel attachment with others is important for the formation of relations and also plays a key role in the psychotherapy process. In the therapy process, the child’s and the therapist’s unconscious, or implicit, relational knowledge intersect to create an intersubjective field that includes reasonably accurate ideas about the other’s way of being with others. A "moment of meeting" is an event that reshapes the child’s implicit relational knowledge as a result of an altered intersubjective field between the child and therapist.
