ABSTRACT
This chapter sets out how we encounter anger on a daily basis. We often experience anger as a blend of pain and pleasure – the pain of being hurt and the pleasure from revenge and acting out the anger. Therefore, in anger there is both pleasure and power. That is why anger so easily gets out of hand. Gentleness is the virtue that counters anger. It is patient and peaceful – by comparison, a state very different from anger. At first glance, it is difficult to imagine how anger and gentleness are interrelated because their outward expressions are truly opposite. Examining them more closely though, we can see that the underlying theme that links them both is “acceptance.” The difficulty for many leaders is to strike the right balance between aggression and gentleness. Dante says anger is “excessive love of justice perverted to revenge and spite.” It is too much a conviction of being right but not recognized for that, and so is accompanied by the feeling you are being unfairly treated.
