ABSTRACT
Managing Emotional States is a core aspect of Breakthrough Conversations, since it is through self-regulation of emotions that clients are more able to speak and listen consciously and skilfully. Mindfulness, and the application of mindfulness to foster the character habits of compassion and appreciation, are the qualities that underpin the capacity to manage emotional states. Practical techniques are introduced to clients for cultivating these qualities. Through guided inquiry, clients are invited to attune to their body-brain states by paying attention to body sensations and behaviours, both verbal and non-verbal, to be able to distinguish RED, AMBER and GREEN (RAG) body brain states. These different states are linked with corresponding behavioural tendencies during conversations and the need to foster GREEN states in order to have more skilful conversations. GREEN body-brain states, supported by the social engagement systems and activity in the prefrontal cortex, enable us to observe reactive or habitual impulses arising from RED or AMBER body-brain circuits without letting them drive our behaviour, and it is this process that represents emotional regulation. A further framework, PACES, enables clients to deconstruct their approach to specific conversations into the four experiential domains of Actions, Cognitions, Emotions and Sensations, and to identify how to move from limiting to enabling patterns of interaction. One further technique is introduced, the 9 -Minute Form, specifically for supporting clients to sustain emotional regulation during conversations. These interactive techniques can be usefully supported by formal mindfulness practices, and clients are encouraged to experiment with a range of widely available resource.
