ABSTRACT

This chapter looks more at the inner life of the most personal of these relationships—those that give expression to intimacy and sexuality. The term 'non-heterosexual' is used to refer not just to lesbian, gay and bisexual people, but also others who are unable or unwilling to ascribe a label to themselves, but who nonetheless do not see themselves as heterosexual. The term family has been synonymous not just with heterosexuality broadly defined, but with a very specific brand of heterosexuality, which ideally involves marriage, baby making, monogamy, ownership of property, espousing middle class and white values, etc. Despite the decrease in the proportion of married people, being married or being involved in another type of intimate partnership continues to act as a marker of successful ageing and, perhaps normatively, of a 'successful' life. Disagreements most commonly relate to leisure activities, negotiating intimacy and sexual practices, and financial matters.