Change is hard work and the use of therapist force and energy

Here is a typical exchange that I have with my clients about psychotherapeutic change: Windy

Would you like to get over your problems quickly, at a moderate pace or slowly?

Client

Quickly.

Windy

How much effort do you want to put into therapy: a lot, a moderate amount or hardly any? Be honest now.

Client

Well, if I’m honest, hardly any!

Windy

So, let me sum up. You want to get over your problems quickly and with hardly any effort on your part. Is that correct?

Client

Well … yes … but put like that I guess it’s unrealistic.

Windy

Why do you say that?

Client

Because saying that I can get over my problems, which I have had for a long time, quickly and without any effort sounds like magic.