ABSTRACT
Just as all humans are unique, all parents are different from their children. Sometimes parents’ reactions to differences are pleasurable and enriching, sometimes disturbing. When a child has a trait that is completely alien to a parent, a trait a parent has but is trying to conceal, or a trait that a parent envies, parent-child interactions can be disturbed. Gender differences between parent and child can provide an opportunity for vicarious trigger revived fears or envy. Examples include parents’ reactions to parent-child physical and temperament trait differences. Responses to cultural and language differences between parents and their families of origin are also described. A vignette is presented about a mother-daughter skin color difference and the resolution of the attachment problems and developmental delays that occurred.
