ABSTRACT
Some who were interviewed talked of feeling numb early in grieving, and delaying the onset of intense grief through numbness and denial. This might be especially so for losses that were sudden and unexpected. Some had trouble using the word “death,” either as part of denial or as an expression of religious beliefs that frame what has happened as a “transition” rather than a “death.” Soon after the death some interviewees felt that they were losing their mind or that the world had turned so upside down that they had trouble navigating it. They might talk about losing their sense of self or their sense of direction. Early in bereavement some felt alone and lonely and some kept busy. Some of course had to keep busy because of legal, financial, and estate hassles that might be a distraction from the early grief process or might combine with it. Many interviewees talked about what they saw as African American cultural norms about early grief. Primary among these norms is that crying is acceptable or even necessary and the sense that one should be strong for one’s family.
