ABSTRACT
This chapter contains two Clinical Pearls (CP), aphorisms that the author has used during his career as a psychotherapist and a supervisor to advance the therapeutic process. Examples from individual, couple, and group therapy illustrate the first CP, “There aren’t that many ways to get attention. You can be really, really good or really, really bad.” Therapists are at risk of exploiting the “niceness” of the very, very good patient as they seek respite from the daily bombardment of anger, hostility, sadism, hate, and vengeance from the so-called very, very, bad patient. The second CP—To patients who accuse me of not caring about them, I DON’T say “It feels to you that you have an uncaring therapist.” Instead, I say, “What is it like for you to have an uncaring therapist?” offers ways the therapist might welcome and deepen the expression of patients’ negative feelings. The concepts and rationale underlying this second CP are discussed. This approach may not be indicated for some patients.
