ABSTRACT
I was born and raised in the communal system of the kibbutz, and although my family and I left the kibbutz at a rather early age, I remained fascinated with its original life style. I have carried with me some very warm conscious memories of the unique childhood I experienced, mainly of endless nature and creativity, but I was always aware that my childhood experiences were as if split into two halves – days were beautiful and rich in experiences while nights were almost pure terror and extremely lonely. But it was only after my own analysis, and through my experience in treating people whose childhood was rooted deeply in the kibbutz, that I began to better understand some of the long-term effects of the kibbutz’s child-rearing arrangement. Children in the kibbutz were not raised by their biological parents, but were given away to the children’s communal system immediately upon coming home from the maternity ward, at the age of three days. They were grouped together according to their birth, and were taken care of by caretakers (women members of the kibbutz). There were three to four caretakers throughout the day, and two women who were responsible for all the children of the kibbutz, aged three days to eighteen years (around 200 children) through the night. Children were united with their biological parents for three hours each afternoon, but other than that, parents had no say in their children’s upbringing. Such arrangement may seem crazy today, but it was founded upon sound ideology. Freud actually had a lot to do with it, and the kibbutz movement based this ideology on his theory, citing the Oedipus complex as one reason to separate the children from their biological parents. Other reasons had to do with security problems – during the early days of the Zionist settlements it was easier to guard the children if they were grouped together.
Regardless of the uniqueness of this method of raising babies, I think that the following may be interesting and relevant to other methods, less extreme. In an era in which equality is becoming more of a norm, it may be easier to forget how important mothers are to the well-being of their children, and the crucial significance of the earliest object relations may be put aside.
