ABSTRACT
This chapter explores how individuals experience identity formation as a process of deconstruction and reconstruction. Whilst in crisis (discussed in Chapter 3), fragmentation resulted from a violent rupture caused by oppressive binary narratives. At this stage, one engages in self-analysis, where one pulls oneself apart and attempts to reconstitute Self in authenticity. Authenticity here encompasses accepting parts of the Self that diverge from societal standards of normalcy, and belonging begins to be defined in terms of self-awareness rather than fitting in. For example, expressions of being that do not find a home in mainstream academia cease to be pathologised or reworked to fit in. Alterity becomes a viable option for belonging. Since identity construction happens in relation to space and others, one has to continuously negotiate narratives that compete for one’s allegiance, offering only two choices – for or against the Self. This chapter explores how participants’ intellectual identities have been a continuous process of learning and unlearning that pre and post-dates the temporality of the doctoral space. I argue that the doctoral space is the climax of an intellectual identity already in formation. However, the doctorate is also the beginning of new possibilities that are not fixed but remain changeable.
