ABSTRACT
This chapter is an oral history told by Stanley, a 59-year-old white, bisexual, cisgender man, and his wife Christine, a 48-year-old white, bisexual, cisgender woman, both living in the Bronx, New York, with context and analysis by the author. Stanley and Christine met in their 50s and 40s, respectively, at a bisexual sex party, so they were both out to each other simply by being there, without saying a word. They hooked up at the party, had sex a few days later, continued dating and getting to know each other quickly, and were married within a year. Stanley had always been aware of his fluid attractions, but he described himself as “heteroflexible” until Christine brought him to a Bi+ discussion group, when he embraced a bi label. Christine had identified as bisexual since college, and their mutual understanding of bisexuality has helped them trust and communicate with each other. They are non-monogamous and in the “lifestyle”, so they frequently attend play parties, swap partners, and have sex with other people, but they don’t identify as polyamorous, so they don’t date or have romantic relationships with others – just sex – and they always come home to each other.
