ABSTRACT
Now that my retirement date is approaching, I can’t wait! After all these years of living up to the expectations of others, it is time for me. Congregants keep trying to express concern for my fatigue at keeping up with the demands of a growing and busy congregation. I appreciate their concern but can’t tell them the truth. My wife and I have been living a sham of a marriage for more years than I care to remember. I don’t think she loves me and know that she deeply resents my intense engagement with the congregation. The only clear outcome of a year of marriage counseling was an agreement that we’d stay married until our children were out of the house and I was retired from the congregation. As much as we both want to be able to breathe and start new lives, neither of us could bear the embarrassment or well-intentioned meddling of congregants. If I didn’t feel the need to move away, perhaps far away, as soon as possible, I could have continued my work here; but I just can’t. I am both sad and hopeful.
