ABSTRACT
Individual symptoms, especially in children or adolescents, are often a clear signal of the complexity a family faces in coping with stages that require the rearrangement of roles and functions, and especially a shift in the caregiving and the affective dimension. For example, the birth of a first child is an exciting new event for most families, but at the same time it requires a transformation of the loving relationship between two partners in order to include a third person – the baby – into their intimate world. Children leaving home require a rearrangement of the parents’ life, as they have to renegotiate their emotional stance, and find a new adjustment and maturity in their couple relationship. In contrast, we also see a growing number of adult children who left home forced to return to their parents’ house because of an illness, relational problems or financial setbacks. This event has been creating a boomerang generation and a new crowded-nest syndrome (Shaputis, 2003; Collins, Jordan & Coleman, 2007). Further transformations are often observed following the death of an elderly parent/grandparent. Each family will handle the issue of an expected but significant loss with very different attitudes. Grief and mourning are not standard emotional responses and families cannot learn from books how to deal with their suffering and get on with their lives. Some families will have access to more resources and skills to deal with periods of developmental crisis. Others will perceive any change as a threat and will struggle. Some will find support within the extended family, their network of friendships and their social system, while others will feel isolated and lonely.
