ABSTRACT
These are imperative statements driving the client's behaviour, such as 'I must always do perfectly' and 'I should never let my friends down'. These rules are maladaptive because they are rigid, do not allow for human fallibility or changes in circumstances. Must and should statements 'usually link up with a hidden "or else"' statement. The client's 'or else' statement attached to 'I shouldn't forget to phone my mother' was 'this will prove that I am an uncaring daughter'. If the client is receptive, the therapist can inject some humour into this should spotting process and must by asking her client: 'Have you been engaging in some S and M in the last week?' It is important to point out that not all must and should statements uttered by clients require clinical scrutiny: the therapist's important task is to help her clients to discriminate between the various meanings embedded in these words.
