ABSTRACT
They call loss of a loved one heartbreak; it can feel like part of the self is damaged. A sense of intact identity has to be reformed, based on new information about what the current loss of an attachment means to the self. Bereavement means a great deal of change: what the relationship meant, what consequences of loss will occur, and how the absence of an alliance affects all other interactions with the world. In this chapter, we will discuss just part of how and why that redefinition of self occurs, and examine it as a model of possible phases of identity growth. A short vignette illustrates how, during grief, intrusive self-states may occur early on, as altered, unexpected and unwanted experiences, before the change processes of grief work.
