ABSTRACT
This chapter explores the issues that arise when a person does come forward—specifically, when a son tells his mother and father that he is gay—and reviews two studies of the ways in which his parents are likely to respond. It discusses a similar circumstance: the process that is set into motion when a homosexual husband and father comes out to his wife and children, nearly always a stunning revelation. The chapter deals with suggestions for the gay person who is considering telling his relatives about himself, as well as advice for the family members themselves. A nearly universal characteristic of those who are gay is a reluctance, at least initially, to come out to their families, with a sizable segment of the homosexual population never coming forward to their loved ones at all. A 1989 survey, for instance, found that roughly 20 to 40 percent of its gay sample had not shared this important personal information with their families.
