ABSTRACT
Women in remarriages involving children, or in long-term second or subsequent relationships involving children, commonly have unrealistic expectations of themselves—expectations often reinforced by their partners, by their relatives, and by society in general. Society gives women the responsibility for nurturing the family and maintaining its smooth emotional functioning. Many women in remarriages feel this to be their prime mission in life, a mission reinforced very frequently by their husbands and at times by friends and relatives. The stepfather then may withdraw and the mother feels let down and abandoned by her husband. There may be a triangular situation with three involved adults, with the stepmother feeling jealous of the continuing contact between her husband and his ex-wife. A mother/stepmother talked of her situation, commenting that the number of variations within stepfamilies is very great. There are many ways, however, in which the course of step- mothering can be made smoother.
