ABSTRACT
Research on identity development and wellbeing of gay men often focuses on the negative impacts of prejudice and discrimination, and how the negative societal stigma is internalised. However, sexual minority members also do not grow up being exposed to any proper representations of their identities, and they often lack certain ‘ordinary privileges’ in their daily life that deliver belonging to the majority, yet invisibly undermine it for gay men. In turn, gay men struggle to make sense of their own experiences within this unequal system. To expose the other side of discrimination, in this autoethnography, Yasin explores the nature and consequences of lacking ordinary privileges in one’s daily life due to being a member of a sexual minority. Through storytelling, Yasin introduces life narratives touching upon masculinity, sexual positions, and stereotypes eliciting several emotions including fear, shame, anger, and occasionally hope. He discusses these examples within the context of social psychological research with a critique of existing societal structures. Taking an intersectional approach, Yasin also examine links to ethnic and religious identities and discuss how certain intersecting identities amplify the negative impacts. Overall, Yasin proposes an intertwined approach of positive identity development and social change over the glorification of individual resilience falsely based on meritocracy.
